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Brutally, unapologetically, mercilessly- killed by this, this, this- GNU.
 Burning of Money
Remember when you could take US$20 and get Z$2 billion on the street, but get Z$50 billion if you wanted the money transferred into your account? That was called kupisa (burning). It made hexatrillionnaires of some Zimbos and got others into jail. Well, it's no more, thanks to the GNU.
 The Zeroes of Inflation
There was a time in 2008 when there was not enough space on a cheque to write the full amount. How do you fit Z$712,225,305,266,302.00 onto the ‘numbers’ part of a cheque page? If you think that’s bad, wait until you start writing it out in words: Seven hundred and twelve trillion two hundred and twenty-five billion three hundred and- P.T.O.- five thousand dollars two hundred and sixty-six thousand three hundred and two dollars only. Thank goodness for the GNU the zeros are gone.
 The Zimdollar
They say the Zimdollar has just taken a nap and will be back one day. For now, it’s dead my friends. Dead as a dodo. Except on eBay and in the town of Victoria Falls where you can sell your trillion dollar notes quite easily as souvenirs.
 ATM Queues & Full Banks
When was the last time you walked into a bank and there was a queue? I can’t remember. When was the last time a bank employee treated you badly? No clue. Now whenever you get into a banking hall there is service. When you get to an ATM, you don’t have to join a queue (if the ATM is working and has money), AND, wait for it, you only put your card in ONCE! To get your daily limit! Modern convenience is upon us.
 Vakomana veFuel
It used to piss me off, how you couldn’t find fuel anywhere except on the street at one time. They were every where those young men with their five litre containers. The problem was that you never knew what you were buying (unless you were like one of the characters in one Petina Gappah story who tasted his fuel before he bought it). Your ‘fuel’ could be mixed with anything- from paraffin to urine. Now, we drive up to the fuel station like normal people and buy our petrol and diesel from a thingy that whirs intelligently as it glugs out the liquid whose drops we once fought over.
 VISAs to South Africa
I’m not sure whether this one can be directly attributed to the GNU. However, it happened during the era of the GNU so hey, thanks GNU! I could not believe my ears that day last year when I heard it on the radio. No more VISAs needed to go to South Africa!!! Wow! Unbelievable! However, the GNU killed something else, which makes the death of VISAs to SA a pretty meaningless occurrence for many Zimbabweans. See the next point.
 Grocery Trips to South Africa
With the dollarisation of the economy that came about in January 2009 because of the GNU, it became so unprofitable to get onto a bus and buy your cooking oil and sugar across the border in South Africa or Botswana- or anywhere else for that matter. Yes, there are still a few things that you can make a profit on. But the rush for the SA border every weekend, the mushrooming of “macrossborder traders” and “commodity broking” businesses every where- that’s dead. So when we least needed it we had a free pass to the land that could have once solved our grocery woes (Refer to point number 6).
 A Reason Not to Go Back Home
This is not funny at all for those involved. There are thousands of Zimbos being threatened with deportation from the UK because Gordon Brown and his peeps believe (whether rightly or wrongly) that Zimbabwe is now a safe place to live. So the asylum seeker’s excuse that Zim is dangerous just does not hold it together anymore.
 An Increase in the Number of Online News Sites
There was a time when it seemed that Zimbabwe was the world’s most lucrative source of attention grabbing headlines. From CNN, to BBC to Al Jazeera, we were there fellow countrymen, in all our resplendent misery. Not to be left out, we started our own websites to tell our story- and make some money from advertising. They were popping up everywhere those sites. Some were just full of sensationalist nonsense- and still are. Some were more serious about their reporting- and still are. But all in all, the hits are down, the market is over populated with mediocre we-cut-change-the-positions-of-commas-and-paste-our-news websites and there is hardly any reason to visit them daily any more.
 Empty Supermarkets
Eish!. This one was harsh but we all did it; walking up and down the aisles of an empty supermarket, pushing a trolley or holding a basket, and hoping that something would pop up on the shelves so that we could walk out with something, anything. Those days are gone my friends. Totally murdered by the GNU, and I don’t hear anyone complaining.
- Fungai Tichawangana
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Some things dies slowly my friend. Be patient.
